What are signs of low emotional intelligence?


„Emotional intelligence (EQ), according to , refers to the capability of an individual to identify and control her and others’ emotions. is considered to manifest itself in three skills: emotional awareness, relationship management and self-management.

R. Boyatzis and D. Goleman found 12 domains (4 each) specifying and elucidating skills defining EQ.

Here are the signs of low EQ, according to 4 different sources, (I chose the primary ones, hopefully, objectively)

  1. Not apologizing. Your ego stands on your way of admitting your fault and making another person feel better. Which one is more important? Your ego, or someone else’s well being?
  2. Internal drive toward pessimism and almost nonexistent problem-solving skills during hard times.
  3. Lack of interest in people.
  4. Not being judicious and prudent in recognizing people, their character, strengths and weaknesses.
  5. Lack of empathy.
  6. Not being able to handle criticism without anxiety, blame, or excuses.
  7. Missing cues from people around, not being attentive to details about people’s personalities and their reactions to you.
  8. Inclination towards being manipulated, particularly by ideologies or people focusing on your personal problems.
  9. Not praising people who deserve it. Being resentful in some way or another.
  10. Not being grateful for things you do or don’t have.
  11. Lack of emotional self-control. Well, that one was obvious.
  12. Lying. People with high EQ not only don’t lie, but also don’t sugarcoat the truth. Once a wise man said: “Hurt me with the truth, but never comfort me with the lie”. This quote is personally valuable to me and so true. By being almost disrespectfully truthful, you might hurt a man for a day or two, but by lying to him, you will hurt him for life.”


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